Marriage Certificates ~ Part 9

Marriage Certificates ~ Part 9

Three Marriage Certificates

On your wedding day you will sign three certificates with your two witnesses and your celebrant.

First Marriage Certificate

The first one is yours to keep.
This is the most appealing one to look at.
Lucky you get to keep it.

Second marriage Certificate

The second stays in the Celebrant’s Wedding Register. 

Third Marriage Certificate

And the third certificate (the duplicate) is sent to the Births Deaths and Marriages office in the state in which you are married.

In this way your marriage is officially registered.

Registered Marriage Certificate

If you wish to receive a registered copy of your marriage certificate, then a separate application can be made to the Office of Births, Deaths and Marriages at any time.

I can make this easier for you, if we make a simple plan before your wedding.
Ask me to show you a way during the registration proces; an extra free service I offer to you.

BDM QLD regisitered certificate of marriage

Commemorative Certificates

If you do choose to order one of the official registered certificates, Queensland Births, deaths and Marriages gives you the option of a commemorative certificate as well, for an extra fee!

Here are the commemorative samples:

Queensland commemorative marriage certificate - cove design

 

 

 

Queensland commemorative marriage certificate - double happiness design
Poetry and Prose ~ Part 8

Poetry and Prose ~ Part 8

Poetry & Prose

Some examples of readings for your wedding ceremony.  Or perhaps one of these is the basis of your vows or the ceremony script.

Anon

Our love is strengthened by knowing that
each of us could survive on our own
if we wanted to…

but realising that more than anything
we choose to be together

As Long As Your Eyes Are Blue ~ A B Paterson 1891~

Wilt thou love me, sweet, when my hair is grey
And my cheeks shall have lost their hue?
When the charms of youth shall have passed away,
Will your love as of old prove true?

For the looks may change, and the heart may range,
And the love be no longer fond;
Wilt thou love with truth in the years of youth
And away to the years beyond?

Oh, I love you, sweet, for your locks of brown
And the blush on your cheek that lies —
But I love you most for the kindly heart
That I see in your sweet blue eyes.

For the eyes are signs of the soul within,
Of the heart that is leal and true,
And mine own sweetheart, I shall love you still,
Just as long as your eyes are blue.

For the locks may bleach, and the cheeks of peach
May be reft of their golden hue;
But mine own sweetheart, I shall love you still,
Just as long as your eyes are blue.

from Captain Corelli’s Mandolin by Louis de Bernieres

Love is a temporary madness,
it erupts like volcanoes and then subsides.

And when it subsides you have to make a decision.

You have to work out whether your roots have so entwined together
that it is inconceivable that you should ever part.

Because this is what love is.

Love is not breathlessness,
it is not excitement,
it is not the promulgation of eternal passion.

That is just being “in love” which any fool can do.

Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away,
and this is both an art and a fortunate accident.

Those that truly love, have roots that grow towards each other underground,
and when all the pretty blossom have fallen from their branches,
they find that they are one tree and not two.

EXCERPT FROM 100 LOVE SONNETS ~ Pablo Neruda ~

I do not love you as if you were salt-rose, or topaz, or the arrow of carnations the fire shoots off. I love you as certain dark things are to be loved, in secret, between the shadow and the soul.

I love you as the plant that never blooms but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers; thanks to your love a certain solid fragrance, risen from the earth, lives darkly in my body.

I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride; so I love you because I know no other way than this: Where “I” does not exist, nor “You”, so close that your hand on my chest is my hand, so close that your eyes close as I fall asleep.

HINDU MARRIAGE POEM

You have become mine forever.
Yes, we have become partners.
I have become yours.
Hereafter, I cannot live without you.
Do not live without me.
Let us share the joys.
We are word and meaning, unite.
You are thought and I am sound.

May the nights be honey-sweet for us.
May the mornings be honey-sweet for us.
May the plants be honey-sweet for us.
May the earth be honey-sweet for us.

From THE PROPHET ~ Kahlil Gibran ~

Love has no other desire but to fulfill itself.
But if you love and must needs have desires, let here be your desires:
To melt and be like a running brook that sings its melody to the night.
To know the pain of too much tenderness.
To be wounded by your own understanding of love;
And to bleed willingly and joyfully.
To wake at dawn with a winged heart and give thanks for another day of loving;
To rest at the noon hour and meditate love’s ecstasy;
To return home at eventide with gratitude;
And then to sleep with a prayer for the beloved in your heart
And a song of praise upon your lips.

A Bit of fun

OH THE PLACES YOU’LL GO ~ Dr Seuss ~

Congratulations!
Today is your day.
You’re off to Great Places!
You’re off and away!
You have brains in your head.
You have feet in your shoes.
You can steer yourself
any direction you choose.

You’re on your own. And you know what you know.
And YOU are the couple who’ll decide where to go.
You’ll look up and down streets. Look ‘em over with care.
About some you will say, “We don’t choose to go there.”
With your heads full of brains and your shoes full of feet,
you’re too smart to go down, any not-so-good street.

And you may not find any
you’ll want to go down.
In that case, of course,
you’ll head straight out of town.
It’s opener there
in the wide open air,

Out there things can happen
and frequently do
to people as brainy
and footsy as you.
And when things start to happen,
don’t worry. Don’t stew.
Just go right along.
You’ll start happening too.

OH! THE PLACES YOU’LL GO!
You’ll be on your way up!
You’ll be seeing great sights!
You’ll join the high fliers
who soar to great heights!
You won’t lag behind, because you’ll have all the speed.
You’ll pass the whole gang, and you’ll soon take the lead.

Wherever you fly you’ll be best of the best.
Wherever you go, you will top all the rest.

Except when you don’t.
Because sometimes, you won’t.
You’ll get mixed up of course,
as you already know.
You’ll get mixed up
with so many strange birds as you go.
So be sure when you step.
Step with great care and great tact
and remember that Life’s a Great Balancing Act.

Just never forget to be dexterous and deft.
And never mix up your right foot with your left.
And will you succeed?
Yes! You will indeed!
(98 and ¾ percent guaranteed.)
KIDS, YOU’LL MOVE MOUNTAINS!

So, be your name Buxbaum or Dowrie or Bass
or Mordecai Ali Van Allen O’Shea,
you’re off to great places!
Today is your day!
Your mountain is waiting.
So … get on your way!

 

 

 

 

 From Winnie the Pooh
A Love Blessing author unknown

Be all that you are,
The sun will find you…give you her warmth
And bless you with her golden touch

As you awaken.
The wind will call you as you gently bend
And become open to the world that surrounds you.

The soil will ground you
The water will nourish you
You have been planted here.

The world is yours –
To enjoy…
To expand …
To go wherever you want.

Life is the gift you have been given,
Love is the blessing you can feel.

It is all around…
In the flowers,
In the trees,
In the meadows,
On the mountaintops.

Accept the gifts of this new day.
Be a part of every person who is here.
We are all just hearts, alone and together,
Beating to the music inside,
Fulfilling our ambitions,
Finding our places,
In the wonder of the universe.

More than to hope in yourselves, may you believe in yourselves.
Take each other’s hands on this new journey.
In the quiet, you will hear the voice of wisdom.
In the stillness you will realise your deepest dreams,
And in your hearts you will know how deeply you are loved.

The Life that I have by Leo Marks

The Life That I Have

The life that I have
Is all that I have
And the life that I have
Is yours

The love that I have
Of the life that I have
Is yours and yours and yours.

A sleep I shall have
A rest I shall have
Yet death will be but a pause
For the peace of my years
In the long green grass
Will be yours and yours and yours.

I LOVE YOU ~ Unknown ~

I love you not only for what you are,
But for what I am when I am with you
I love you not only for what you have made of yourself
But for what you are making me
I love you for the part of me that you bring out.
I love you for passing over all my foolish and weak traits,
That you can’t help but see
I love you for drawing out into the light my beauty,
That no one else had looked quite far enough to din
I love you.

Leap into the void ~ Yves Klein 1957~ 

Come with me into the void
If you return one day
You who, like me dream,
Of that wonderful void
That absolute love
I know that together
Without needing to say a single word to each other 
We will leap
Into the reality of that void
That awaits our love
The way I wait for you every day
Come with me into the void

 From the Bible:

Corinthians 13 : 4-8 (King James version)

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.

It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.

Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.

Corinthians 13 : 1-13 (The Message)

If I speak with human eloquence and angelic ecstasy but don’t love, I’m nothing but the creaking of a rusty gate. If I speak God’s Word with power, revealing all his mysteries and making everything plain as day, and if I have faith that says to a mountain, “Jump,” and it jumps, but I don’t love, I’m nothing. If I give everything I own to the poor and even go to the stake to be burned as a martyr, but I don’t love, I’ve gotten nowhere. So, no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I’m bankrupt without love.  Love never gives up. Love cares more for others than for self. Love doesn’t want what it doesn’t have. Love doesn’t strut, Doesn’t have a swelled head, Doesn’t force itself on others, Isn’t always “me first,” Doesn’t fly off the handle, Doesn’t keep score of the sins of others, Doesn’t revel when others grovel, Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth, Puts up with anything, Trusts God always, Always looks for the best, Never looks back, But keeps going to the end. Love never dies.

Inspired speech will be over some day; praying in tongues will end; understanding will reach its limit. We know only a portion of the truth, and what we say about God is always incomplete. But when the Complete arrives, our incompletes will be canceled. When I was an infant at my mother’s breast, I gurgled and cooed like any infant. When I grew up, I left those infant ways for good. We don’t yet see things clearly. We’re squinting in a fog, peering through a mist. But it won’t be long before the weather clears and the sun shines bright! We’ll see it all then, see it all as clearly as God sees us, knowing him directly just as he knows us! But for right now, until that completeness, we have three things to do to lead us toward that consummation: Trust steadily in God, hope unswervingly, love extravagantly. And the best of the three is love.

More Poems

SONG ~ Daniel Handler of The Magnetic Fields ~

Asleep and Dreaming
I’ve seen you laugh at nothing at all
I’ve seen you sadly weeping
The sweetest thing I ever saw
was you asleep and dreaming
I’ve seen you when your ship came in
And when your train was leaving
The sweetest thing I ever saw
was you asleep and dreaming
Well you may not be beautiful
But it’s not for me to judge
I don’t know if you’re beautiful
Because I love you too much……

NOVEMBER ~ F.S. Flint ~

What is eternal of you
I saw in both your eyes.

You were among the apple branches;
the sun shone, and it was November.

Sun and apples and laughter
and love we gathered, you and I.

And the birds were singing.

NATURE BOY song lyrics by Nat King Cole

There was a boy
A very strange enchanted boy
They say he wandered very far, very far
Over land and sea
A little shy
And sad of eye
But very wise
Was he

And then one day
A magic day he c
me my way
And while we spoke of many things, fools and kings
This he said to me

“The greatest thing
You’ll ever learn
Is just to love
And be loved
In return”

WHY MARRIAGE? ~ Mari Nichols-Haining ~

Because to the depths of me, I long to love one person,
With all my heart, my soul, my mind, my body…

Because I need a forever friend to trust with the intimacies of me,
Who won’t hold them against me
Who loves me when I’m unlikable,
Who sees the small child in me, and
Who looks for the divine potential of me…

Because I need to cuddle in the warmth of the night
With someone who thanks God for me
With someone I feel blessed to hold…

Because marriage means opportunity
To grow in love in friendship…

Because marriage is a discipline
To be added to a list of achievements…

Because marriages do not fail, people fail
When they enter into marriage
Expecting another to make them whole…

Because, knowing this,
I promise myself to take full responsibility
For my spiritual, mental and physical wholeness
I create me,
I take half of the responsibility for my marriage
Together we create our marriage…

Because with this understanding
The possibilities are limitless.

LOVE’S PHILOSOPHY ~ Percy Bysshe Shelley ~

The fountains mingle with the river,
And the rivers with the ocean

The winds of heaven mix forever
With a sweet emotion;
Nothing in the world is single:
All things by a law divine
In another’s being mingle–
Why not I with thine?

See, the mountains kiss high heaven,
And the waves clasp one another

No sister flower could be forgiven
If it disdained its brother;
And the sunlight clasps the earth,
And the moonbeams kiss the sea;–
What are all these kissings worth,
If thou kiss not me?

HOPE IS THE THING WITH FEATHERS ~ Emily Dickenson~

Hope is the thing with feathers
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all,

And sweetest in the gale is heard;
And sore must be the storm
That could abash the little bird
That kept so many warm.

I’ve heard it in the chilliest land,
And on the strangest sea
Yet, never, in extremity
It asked a crumb of me.

FIDELITY ~ Dorothy Colgan ~

Man and woman are like the earth, that brings forth flowers
in summer, and love, but underneath is rock.
Older than flowers, older than ferns, older than foraminiferae,
older than plasm altogether is the soul underneath.
And when, throughout all the wild chaos of love
slowly a gem forms, in the ancient, once-more-molten rocks
of two human hearts, two ancient rocks,
a man’s heart and a woman’s,
that is the crystal of peace, the slow hard jewel of trust,
the sapphire of fidelity.
The gem of mutual peace emerging from the wild chaos of love.

A NEW BEGINNING ~ Gwen Frostic ~

On this earth there is a oneness
A rhythmic flow through everything that lives
The things with roots and stems and leaves
The things with shells and fins and furs
The things with wings with which to fly
The things that crwal and those that walk
Each thing must eat and breath and rest
Each thing must seek and each is sought for
Each has a birth, a purpose to fulfill
To each an end and then a new beginning.

BRIDAL SONG ~ John Ford ~

Comforts lasting, loves increasing,
Like soft hours never ceasing:
Plenty’s pleasure, peace complying,
Without jars, or tongues envying;
Hearts by holy union wedded,
More than theirs by custom bedded;
Fruitful issues; life so graced,
Not by age to be defaced,
Budding, as the year ensu’th,
Every spring another youth:
All what thought can add beside
Crown this bridegroom and this bride!

Some Prayers and Prose

A WEDDING READING

You share today the joy of a deep commitment
And a sacred trust, and you have given each other
The most precious gift of love

Treasure it, nurture it and encourage it
With all the honesty you used in creating it

You are sharing something rare and beautiful
Always speak the truth and listen attentively
So that you may understand each others thoughts and intentions

Inspire each other by sharing your accomplishments
Say I love you often to retain the warmth between you

Laugh a lot too, even when you are angry
Remember you are each other’s best friend

Stand together and for each other always
May each day be a blessing
And the fulfillment of your dreams.

FROM THE SANSKRIT

Look to this day for it is life
The very life of life in its brief course
lie all the varieties and realities of your existence
The bliss of growth
The glory of action
The splendor of beauty
For yesterday is already a dream
And tomorrow is only a vision
But today, well lived, makes every yesterday a dream of happiness
And every tomorrow a vision of hope
Look well, therefore, to this day.

WEDDING PRAYER (Adapted) ~ Robert Lois Stevenson (1850-1894) ~

Lord, behold our family and friends here assembled
We thank you for this place in which we celebrate
For the love that it unites us
For the peace accorded to this day
For the hope with which we dream
For the health, the work, the food,
And the bright skies that make our lives delightful
For our friends and family in all parts of the earth.

CELEBRATION ~ Rev. Carl Thitchener 2003 ~

We celebrate the love that brought you to this day.
With love that deepens through many years, may they know its meaning and its mystery-how we become truly one in sharing ourselves with one another, and yet, remain truly two in our own uniqueness. May your house be a place of happiness for all who enter it, a place where the old and the young are renewed in each other’s company, a place for growing, a place for music, a place for laughter. And when shadows and darkness fall within its rooms, may it still be a place of hope and strength for all who enter it, especially for those who may be entrusted in your care. May no person be alien to your compassion. May your larger family be the family of all humankind. And may those who are nearest to you and dearest to you constantly be enriched by the beauty and the energy of your love for each other

Amen.

From A NAVAJO WEDDING CEREMONY

Now you have lit a fire and that fire should not go out.
The two of you now have a fire that represents love,
understanding and a philosophy of life.
It will give you heat, food, warmth and happiness.
The new fire represents a new beginning – a new life and a new family.
The fire should keep burning; you should stay together.
You have lit the fire for life, until old age separates you.

Exerpts from Novels, Essays and recipes

Desiderata ~ Max Ehrmann (in 1927) ~

Go placidly amidst the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible, without surrender be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even the dull and the ignorant; they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons, they are vexatious to the spirit. If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain and bitter; for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.

Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

Exercise caution in your business affairs; for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals; and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself. Especially, do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth. Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here.

And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be, and whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul. With all its shams, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful.

Strive to be happy.

(Desiderata in Latin means things that are wanted, needed or necessary; especially to complete something.  To say something has desiderata means it requires certain virtues deemed important or necessary for success.)

The Invitation ~ Oriah Mountain Dreamer, Indian Elder, May 1994

It does not interest me what you do for a living.  I want to know what you ache for, and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart’s longing.

It doesn’t interest me how old you are.  I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, for your dreams, for the adventure of being alive.

It doesn’t interest me what planets are squaring your moon.  I want to know if you have touched the centre of your own sorrow, if you have been open to life’s betrayals, or have become shrivelled and closed from fear of further pain.

I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own, without moving to hide it or fade it or fix it.

I want to know if you can be with joy, mine or your own, if you can dance with the wildness and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful, be realistic, or to remember the limitations of being human.

It doesn’t interest me if the story you are telling me is true.  I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself, if you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul.

I want to know if you can be faithful and therefore be trustworthy.

I want to know if you can see beauty even when its not pretty every day, and if you source your life from its presence.

I want to now if you can live with failure, yours and mine, and still stand on the edge of the lake and shout to the silver moon, “YES”.

It doesn’t interest me who you know, or how you came to be here.  I want to know if you will stand in the centre of the fire with me and not shrink back.

It doesn’t interest me where or what or with whom you have studied. I want to know what sustains you from the inside when all else fades away. I want to know if you can be alone with yourself and if you truly like the company you keep in the empty moments.

Extract from The Velveteen Rabbit by Margery Williams (1881-1944)

‘What is REAL?’ asked the Rabbit one day, when they were lying side by side near the nursery fender, before Nana came to tidy the room. ‘Does it mean having things that buzz inside you and a stick-out handle?’ ‘Real isn’t how you are made,’ said the Skin Horse. ‘It’s a thing that happens to you. When someone loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, buy REALLY loves you, then you become Real.’ ‘Does it hurt? Asked the Rabbit. ‘Sometimes,’ said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. ‘When you are Real you don’t mind being hurt.’ ‘Does it happen all at once, like being wound up,’ he asked, ‘or bit by bit?’  It doesn’t happen all at once,’ said the Skin Horse. ‘You become. It takes a long time. That’s why it doesn’t happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in your joints and very shabby. But these things don’t matter at all, because once you are Real you can’t be ugly, except to people who don’t understand.’ ‘I suppose you are real?’ said the Rabbit. And then he wished he had not said it, for he thought the Skin Horse only smiled. ‘Someone made me Real,’ he said. ‘That was a great many years ago; but once you are Real you can’t become unreal again. It lasts for always.’

A TAPESTRY OF LOVE

Just as two very different threads woven in opposite directions can form a beautiful tapestry, so can your two lives merge together to form a beautiful marriage.

To make your marriage work will take love.
Love should be the core of your marriage;
love is the reason you are here.
But it will also take trust – to know in your hearts
you want the best for each other.
It will take dedication – to stay open to one another;
to learn and to grow together even when this is not so easy to do.

It will take faith – to always be willing to go forward to tomorrow,
never really knowing what tomorrow will bring.
And it will take commitment – to hold true to a journey
you both now will share together.

FRIENDSHIP

It is often said that it is love that makes the world go round.
However, without doubt, it is friendship which keeps our spinning existence on an even keel.

True friendship provides so many of the essentials for a happy life –
it is the foundation on which to build an enduring relationship,
it is the mortar which bonds us together in harmony,
and it is the calm, warm protection we sometimes need when the world outside seems cold and chaotic.

True friendship holds a mirror to our foibles and failings, without destroying our sense of worthiness.

True friendship nurtures our hopes, supports us in our disappointments, and encourages us to grow to our best potential.

This couple came together as friends, they pledge to each other not only their love but also the strength, warmth and, most importantly, the fun of true friendship.

Eskimo Love Song – Author Unknown

You are my husband, you are my wife
My feet shall run because of you
My feet dance because of you
My heart shall beat because of you
My eyes see because of you
My mind thinks because of you
And I shall love, because of you.

A Good Wedding Cake – Author Unknown

4lb of love
½ of good looks
1 lb of sweet temper
1 lb of butter youth
1 lb of blindness of faults
1 lb of pounded wit
1 lb of good humour
2 tablespoons of sweet argument
1 pint of rippling laughter
1 wine glass of common sense
Dash of modesty

Put the love, good looks and sweet temper into a well-furnished house.
Beat the butter
of youth to a cream, and mix well together with the blindness of faults.
Stir the
pounded wit and good humour into the sweet argument, then add the rippling laughter and common sense.
Add a dash
of modesty and work the whole together until everything is well mixed.
Bake gently
for ever.

A Love Like This, Dan Fogleberg

And now the lonely days are done
And with each rising of the sun, love begins anew
And if you ever ask me why
I know that my love will never die I’ll say these words to you

Of all the souls I’ve ever known
Mine sings to yours and yours alone and yours sings just to me
In all this world I’ll never find
A heart that could beat as close to mine and this time I can see

A love like this is so hard to find
And so many never do
And loves like this, when they even exist
Are precious and few, you know they’re precious and few

Down the miles, through the years
Yours is the star by which I steer, the brightest star I’ve known
And when I feel all hope is gone, yours is the love that leads me on
The light that guides me home
The light that guides me home
Your light will guide me home
The Key to Love, Author Unknown
The key to love is understanding …
as it is the little things that say so much by themselves.
The key to love is forgiveness ….
to accept each others faults and pardon mistakes,
The key to love is sharing …
Sharing and acing your good fortunes as well as the bad, together;
both conquering problems, forever searching for ways
to intensify your happiness.
The key to love is giving …
Giving without thought of return,
but with the hope of just a simple smile,
and by giving in but never giving up.
The key to love is respect …
Respect realizing that you are two separate people, with different ideas;
that you don’t belong to each other,
that you belong with each other, and share a mutual bond.
The key to love is inside us all …
It takes time and patience to unlock all the ingredients
that will take you to its threshold;
it is the continual learning process that demands a lot of work …
but the rewards are more than worth the effort …
and that is the key to love.

Oath of Friendship ~ Anon., China, 1st Century B.C.

I want to be your friend
For ever and ever without break or decay.
When the hills are all flat
And the rivers are all dry,
When it lightens and thunders in winter,
When it rains and snows in summer,
When Heaven and Earth mingle
Not ’til then will I part from you.

What is Love? by Walter Rinder

Love is just not looking at each other and saying “You’re wonderful”.
There are times when we are anything but wonderful.
Love is looking out in the same direction.
It is linking our strength to pull a common load.
It is pushing together towards the far horizons, hand in hand.
Love is knowing that when our strength falters, we can borrow the strength of someone who cares.
Love is a strange awareness that our sorrows will be shared and made lighter by sharing;
that joys will be enriched and multiplied by the joy of another.
Love is knowing someone else cares that we are not alone in life.

Changing To Your Married Name ~ Part 7

Changing To Your Married Name ~ Part 7

Changing Your Name After Marriage

In Australia up to 85% of newly wedded women take their husbands surname.  They choose to do so for many different reasons, not just for tradition’s sake. But modern times offer more flexibility and equality in this matter.  For example, did you know that he can take her name?

Nowadays both husband and wife have the traditional right to take their married surname after marriage. It is essentially a process which happens after the wedding day, not before.  Therefore all the wedding day and marriage paperwork must be done in the maide/batchelor or current name.  AND Your signature remains the same until after the wedding day.

What are my Options?

1. Take Your Partner’s Surname

This is a traditional route where one spouse adopts the surname of the other.

2. Double-Barrelled Surname

Some couples choose to combine both partners’ surnames, creating a new hyphenated surname.

3. Combination of Maiden and Married Name

Another option is to use a combination of your maiden and married names ; with hyphens or not.

4. Keep Your Own Name

Alternatively, you may decide to keep your own name and take no action regarding a name change.

5. A Completely NewName

If you decide to adopt a completely new surname, you will need to get a legal name change procedure going. This costs money!  But with the options provided above, only one party to the marriage need do this process.  The other simply assumes the partner’s name after marriage. This also means that you can revert back to your maiden name any time without any reason. 

To take on your new surname, you only need at least one copy of your registered Marriage Certificate issued by the Registry of Births Deaths and Marriages. 

* Note that the Commonwealth certificate issued to you on your wedding day is a legal and numbered document, however it is not sufficient for this purpose.

** Note also, if you wish to make any other changes to your name, a legal Change of Name process through the registry is required.

The Registered Marriage Certificate

The Registered Marriage Certificate is essentially a copy of what is recorded in the government registry.  To procure thisone you need to apply separately to BDM; it is not automatic.

Applying for the Registered Certificate

With myself, Kari as your celebrant, this is easy.  I can check a box on your marriage forms before lodgement.  The Registry simply sends the certificate to you as soon as your marriage and application is processed.

You can of course choose to apply for the Registered Marriage Certificate at any time after your marriage, even years later! Fill out the official application form online.  Then send off the relevant ID documents required. 

Changing your name

Once you have your official registered marriage certificate, you’re ready to begin changing your name. Start by making photocopies of the certificate and having them certified by a Justice of the Peace (JP). This step ensures that you have verified copies for official use.

Next, begin contacting various institutions and organizations to update your name. Start with essential documents like your driver’s license and passport, as these will facilitate other changes. It’s also a good time to start practicing your new signature!

It is a good idea to keep a certified copy in your wallet for at least a year to cover most bases. 

Note that the Registry can take up to several weeks to process a new marriage.  Wait until you receive it before making important changes to your name (i.e booking international flights).

Keeping records

Maintaining records of your name change process is crucial for organisation and reference. Keep track of which authorities or organisations have been informed of your new name and when they confirm the change. This helps ensure a smooth transition and avoids any discrepancies.

Checklist

Pop this checklist on the fridge to make sure nothing is forgotten. 

.

Authority

Date Contacted

Date Confirmed

QLD Transport (license)

 

 

Passport /Visas

 

 

Car Registration

 

 

Australian Tax Office

 

 

Electoral Commission

 

 

Centrelink

 

 

Bank/s

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Utilities (power/ rates/gas/water)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

ABN register

 

 

Local Shire Council

 

 

Phone provider/s/Internet

 

 

Pay TV/movies/other subscriptions

 

 

Internet

 

 

RACQ

 

 

Insurance/s

 

 

Landlord

 

 

Updated Will

 

 

Suerannuation/s

 

 

 

 

 

Investments and Shares

 

 

Employer/Payroll

 

 

Business matters

 

 

Health providers/legal providers/accountant

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Frequent Flyer/Flybuys

 

 

Sports/recreation clubs

 

 

memberships

 

 

Subscriptions

 

 

Will (marriage immediately voids a prior will)

 

 

Organ Donor Regsiter

 

 

Facebook/LinkedIn/Ebay/paypal/Instagram

 

 

Roadtoll accounts

 

 

Loyalty accounts

 

 

Library

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Other/s

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Exchanging Wedding Rings – Part 6

Exchanging Wedding Rings – Part 6

Exchanging wedding rings

For thousands of years lovers have exchanged rings as a token of their vows……

Of course there is no legal imperative to use rings in your ceremony, but it is a custom that most couples still hold dear for their wedding.  For a ring is a gift you wear forever as a reminder of your wedding day, and the promises you gave to each other.

Shakespeare wrote, “Now join your hands, and with your hands your hearts.” It is believed that the hands are a connection to the heart, and a hand blessing symbolically brings two hearts together.

Something to say

So what does one say when giving the ring? 

It does not need to be a long message.  You have just exchanged vows, the moment which would usually encapsulate your promise.  So for the rings one need not be wordy.

Examples

Here are some examples of something to say whilst slipping the ring on your love’s finger:

  • With this ring I thee wed.
  • I give you this ring as a visible and constant symbol of my promise to be with you as long as I live.
  • I give you this ring as a symbol of my love for you. Let it be a reminder that I am always by your side and that I will always be a faithful partner to you.
  • I give you this ring as a symbol of my love, my faith in our strength together, and my covenant to learn and grow with you
  • Let this ring be a symbol of my promises to you and a reminder of my devotion to you. I am honored to call you my (wife/husband).
  • I give this ring as my gift to you. Wear it and think of me and know that I love you.
  • This ring is a circle with no end, just like my love for you.
  • Wear this ring and recall my promise to you today.
  • As you cherish this ring, so I cherish you.

Say it with a poem

Another delightful solution is to choose someone to read the poem, “These are the Hands…”  No one seems to know the original author, and it has appeared in several versions.  It is also easy to personalise to your own situation.  For example, substitute, young for mature, or care for cherish, or the present tense for the past tense for a longer relationship/engagement or for a renewal of vows….. etc.

These are the hands, author unknown

These are the hands of your best friend, young and strong and full of love, that hold yours on your wedding day.

These are the hands that will work along side yours as you build your future together.

These are the hands that will passionately love you and care for you throughout the years.

These are the hands that will hold you when fear or grief torments your mind and with the slightest touch, will comfort you like no other.

These are the hands that will give you strength when you struggle, and support and encouragement to chase down your dreams.

These are the hands that will tenderly hold your children, and help keep your family together as one.

These are the hands that will, countless times, wipe the tears from yours eyes, tears of sorrow, and tears of joy.

And lastly, these are the hands that even when wrinkled with age, will still be reaching for yours, still giving you the same unspoken tenderness with just a touch—- a touch from these hands.

Ring Warming

How about a handfasting ritual or a ring warming.

Ask me, I’ll tell you how.

Or nothing

Of course you need not say anything at all. Sometimes it is what you do that is as important as what you say. 

Sample Wedding Vows – Part 5b

Sample Wedding Vows – Part 5b

2. Sample vows

Vow 1

______, I love you. Today is a very special day. Long ago you were just a dream and a prayer. This day like a dream come true the prayer has been answered. For today, ______, you as my joy become my crown. I am thankful for the honour of going through time with you. Thank you for being what you are to me. With our future bright, I will care for you, honour and protect you. I lay down my life for you, _____, my friend and my love. Today I give to you me.

Vow 2

Before these witnesses I vow to love you and care for you as long as we both shall live.  I take you, with all your faults and strengths, as I offer myself to you
with all my faults and strengths.  I will help you when you need help, and
turn to you when I need help.  I choose you as the person with whom I will spend my life.

Vow 3

… my partner in life and my one true love. I will cherish our friendship and love you today, tomorrow, and forever. I will trust you and honour you I will laugh with you and cry with you. I will love you faithfully through the best and the worst, through the difficult and the easy. What may come I will always be there. As I have given you my hand to hold so I give you my life to keep.

Vow 4

In the presence of God and these our Friends, I take thee to be my wife/husband, promising with Divine assistance to be unto thee a loving and faithful wife/husband as long as we both shall live.”

Vow 5

… to be my partner, loving what I know of you, and trusting what I do not yet know. I eagerly anticipate the chance to grow together, getting to know the (man/woman) you will become, and falling in love a little more every day. I promise to love and cherish you through whatever life may bring us.

Vow 6

________, with all my love, I take you to be my wife/husband. I will love you through good and the bad, through joy and the sorrow. I will try to be understanding, and to trust in you completely. Together we will face all of life’s experiences and share one another’s dreams and goals. I promise I will be your equal partner in a loving, honest relationship, for as long as we both shall live.

Vow 7

_________, from this day forward I promise you these things. I will laugh with you in times of joy and comfort you in times of sorrow. I will share in your dreams, and support you as you strive to achieve your goals. I will listen to you with compassion and understanding, and speak to you with encouragement. I will remain faithful to our vows for better or for worse, in times of sickness and health. You are my best friend and I will love and respect you always.

Vow 8

  to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, while we both shall live.

Vow 9

__________ I pledge to share my life openly with you, to speak the truth to you in love. I promise to honour and tenderly care for you, to cherish and encourage your own fulfilment as an individual for the rest of my life.

Vow 10

_________I will be a loving husband. I promise to respect you as an individual. I intend to develop as a person in partnership with you. I want to love you through good fortune and adversity, while we both shall live.

Vow 11

______, I declare my love for you, I invite you to share my life as my husband/wife. I promise always to respect your needs, and to accept you as you are. I will be kind, unselfish and trusting. I will work for a happy life for both of us.

Vow 12

______, I want to be with you always just as you are. I choose you above all others, to share my life with me in marriage. I love you for yourself, and I want you to become all that you can be. I promise to honour this pledge as long as I live.

Vow 13

  as my spouse, and my lifelong partner. I will do everything I can to maintain our love. I will talk to you and listen to you. I will give to you and I will take from you. Your success and happiness will be mine.

Vow 14

______, I am proud to take you as my husband/wife for all the time we have been together.
There has always been the kind of love and understanding which is only shared when there is true love.
You have helped me triumph over challenges presented
Encouraged my personal growth and boosted my self esteem.
You have helped me become the person I am today
And with your help I will be a better person tomorrow than I was yesterday.
I love the way you love and care for me.
I love the way you trust and believe in me.
I love the way you always look your best for me.
I love you and I love my life with you.
Today as we begin our lives as husband and wife I commit myself to you.

Vow 15

I will take you in my arms when you need to be held. I will listen when you need to talk. I will laugh with you in times of joy, and comfort you in times of sadness. I will love you for who you are, and help you to become all that you can be. I will age gracefully with you/grow old with you.

Vow 16

______, to say I love you is not enough
To try to condense the depth of my feelings into a few words is impossible.
It doesn´t tell of the respect
I have for you as an individual,
Nor how I appreciate
How tender and caring you are,
Nor the joy I find in your laughter,
Nor the tears I hold back for your pain,
Nor the strength you give when I need it,
Nor the pleasure I feel in your touch.
But if to say I love you means all these things
Then let me say I love you more each day.

Vow 17

______, you are my best friend and my one true love. When I´m with you, I feel I can be the person I want to be, and I cannot imagine my life without you. You make me smile, you stick up for me, you take care of me and you are always interested in what I have to say and do. Today, I want to make a promise to you and to myself, in front of our friends and family, to love and honour, protect and respect you for the rest of my life.

I vow to trust and value your opinions, and stand by your actions. I pledge to always treat you as my best friend, and equal. I will ask for help when I need it, and offer help when necessary. Let us be friends and lovers, and grow old together. And let us make all the years of our lives together be the best years of our lives. For now and forever.

Vow 18

What can I say to you that I haven’t already said,
What can I give you that I haven’t already given,
Is there anything of me that isn’t yours already,
My body, my mind, my heart, even my soul,
Everything that is me belonged to you long before this,
And it shall be yours long after this,
I will follow you anywhere and everywhere you lead,
Hand in hand and heart in heart.

Vow 19

_____________you are my best friend, my confidant and one of my favourite pests. You make me laugh and cry, you are honest and wise. You are my strength and you are kind-hearted. You always love me no matter what. You have always managed to help me through bad times and I cannot imagine my life without you. Today, I want to make a promise to you and to myself, in front of our friends and family, to love, honour and protect you for all the days of my life.

Vow 20

___________  I pledge to remain your companion and friend, I promise to be with you always, to care for you, and to love you no matter how far apart we may be. I will always show an interest in the things you do and your ideas. I will be with you in your heart, and keep you safely in mine. When you are happy, I will be happy with you. When you are sad, I will make you smile. I will encourage you to continue growing as an individual as we work toward our mutual goals. I stand with you as your friend and husband/wife and acknowledge that your choices are valid ones. I promise to give you love, honesty, trust and commitment, and, in general, keep your life interesting as we grow old together.

Vow 21

___________ I will be a loving husband/wife. I promise to respect and encourage your fulfilment as an individual.
In marrying you, I want to continue to build on the love and friendship which we have developed during our time together. I want to continue to cherish the joy of being with you.
I recognise that part of our strength comes from the little things that make us happy. I want to love you through good fortune and adversity, while we both shall live.

Vow 22

______, I treasure the bond we have together, and the strength of our friendship. A friendship I have never had before. I feel cared for by you, and long for your touch and your smile when we are apart. I love your sensitivity, I love your caring nature, I love your enthusiasm. I love your optimism, and your pessimism. I promise to support you in the good and the bad. I promise to appreciate you, and us, as we journey through the rest of our lives. I am proud to be your husband/wife.

Vow 23

______, I feel so proud to be your husband/wife. Having you beside me makes me glow. With all your tenderness, support and strength, knowing I can lean if I need to, makes my fears less. You have given me so much. I love your quietness. I love your stillness. I love your smile. I love the way you love me. Just the way I’ve always wanted to be loved. You encourage my personal growth. You listen and support me as no one else can. Today, the first day of the rest of our lives, I commit myself to you.

Vow 24

I promise to never give up my dreams for you, but instead to include you in them. 

I promise to never ask you to make me your life, but I will joyfully join you in the parts of your life I am invited to.

I promise to ask you questions rather than assuming I know who you are or what you need from me.

I promise to look to what I am grateful for every day, and to also be aware of what is not working so that we can change it.

I promise to support you and to cheer you on in whatever it is you need to do to create the world you desire to live in.

And I promise I will work to put into play everything I have learned about honor, trust, allowance, vulnerability and gratitude to create with you an intimacy and in turn a marriage we can feel both whole and free within.

Vow 25

______, I want to be with you always, just as you are. I choose you above all others to share my life with me in marriage.
I will take you in my arms when you need to be held. I will listen when you need to talk. I will laugh with you in times of joy, and comfort you in times of sadness. I will love you for who you are, and help you to become all that you can be. I will grow old with you. (I will age gracefully with you.)

Vow 26

I promise to give you the best of myself, and to ask of you no more than you can give. I promise to respect you as your own person, and to realise that your interests, desires and needs are no less important than my own. I promise to share with you my time and attention, and to bring joy, strength and imagination to our relationship. I promise to keep myself open to you. I promise to grow along with you – to be willing to face changes as we both change in order to keep our relationship alive and exciting. I promise to love you in good times and in bad, with all I have to give and all I feel inside in the only way I know how completely and forever.

Vow 27

I, _________, promise to love, honour, and cherish you forever. I promise to always stand by your side through the good and the bad times. I promise to be faithful and loving. I promise to be the most compassionate wife through sickness, in health, and the sad times. I promise to give you all of my heart. I promise to be your partner and best friend. And, I promise to love you with all my heart and soul for eternity. Please accept this ring as a symbol of our love and friendship. I love you, [name].

Vow 28

From this day on, I choose you, my beloved ________, to be my (husband/wife). To live with you and laugh with you; to stand by your side, and sleep in your arms; to be joy to your heart, and food for your soul; to bring out the best in you always, and, for you, to be the most that I can. I promise to laugh with you in good times, to struggle with you in bad; to solace you when you are downhearted; to wipe your tears with my hands; to comfort you with my body; to mirror you with my soul; to share with you all my riches and honours; to play with you as much as I can until we grow old; and, still loving each other sweetly and gladly, our lives shall come to an end.


Vow 29

I _________, choose you __________ as my best friend, my love for life. I promise you my deepest love, my fullest devotion, my tenderest care, through the pressures of the present and the uncertainties of the future, I promise to be faithful to you. I promise to love you, to commit to you, and support you. I pledge to respect your unique talents and abilities, to lend you strength for all of your dreams. You have shown me what love feels like and for that I thank you. You are everything I need and at this moment I know all of my prayers have been answered and that all of my dreams have come true. I praise God for you (name); for all of your love and constant friendship. I know that our love is heaven sent and I promise to be here for ever and always. From this day forward, you shall not walk alone. My heart will be your shelter and my arms will be your home. As I have given you my hand to hold, I give you my life to keep.

Vow 30
_____________, you have filled my world with meaning. You have made me so happy and more fulfilled as a person. Thank you for taking me as I am; loving me, and welcoming me into your heart. I promise to always love you, respect you as an individual, and to be faithful to you forever. Today I choose you to be my partner, and commit myself to you for the rest of my life.

Vow 31

________, I promise to love you with all my heart, mind and strength. I promise to be faithful, now and forever. I also promise to respect your children and treat them as if they were my own. I gladly accept the obligations that go along with this pledge. I care for your children and want them to be a part of my life.

With continued love, friendship, trust and communication, I, ________, take joy today in committing my life to yours. ________, when you need me I will be there and when your strength fails you, may mine always be there for you. Side by side, step by step, may our great journey together begin, here now from this day forward.

Vow 32
______, you are my greatest love and my last love. Until I met you I didn’t give true love much thought, but since you came into my life, I struggle desperately to find the words to tell you how much I love you-how I adore you. It is difficult for me to verbalise my feelings for you, because mere words can’t begin to express my deep love. I thank God for you, ______, and I pledge myself to you now, to be your ever-faithful wife/husband. I give you my mind, my body and my heart and I promise to love you and cherish you for as long as we both shall live.

Vow 33
__________, as you have been by my side through my darkest hours, so will I be a light in your life. I will lift you up and support you through laughter and through tears. As you have cared for me in times of infirmity, so will I keep you sheltered when storms arise. I will comfort and console you. I will be the rock that you stand on, the staff that you lean on, and the wings that allow you to fly. As you have inspired me to follow my dreams, so will I strive to help you achieve your goals. I will encourage you in your endeavours and nourish your spirit as we walk through this life together. As you have loved me, so will I love you. I will be by your side, a part of one entity, but above all else, I will allow you to be you.

Vow 34
As we face the future together,
I promise to stand by your side.
I promise to unfailingly share and support your hopes, dreams and goals.
I vow to be there for you always.

When you fall, I will catch you.
When you cry, I will comfort you.
When you laugh, I will share your joy.
Everything I am and everything I have is yours,
from this moment forth and for eternity.

Vow 35

I will speak the truth to you in Love. I will encourage you and strengthen you in your walk with God. I will not let the sun go down on my anger, instead I will be gracious, tender-hearted, and forgiving even as God has forgiven me. I will be peaceful, content and joyful in every situation we encounter knowing that God is at work.

Vow 36
______, since we have been together, you have provided me with strength, security, confidence, honesty, love & plenty of much needed guidance.

Where there has been cold, you have brought warmth; where my life was dark, you have brought light. In my darkest trouble, in my coldest silence, I looked for you and you were there.

You are truly my knight in shining armour. You may not realise it but you have helped me and saved me in so many ways and I love you for that.

I am honoured that you will have me as your wife and I am proud to have you as my husband. I believe that we were meant to be from the start & I will always love you with all my heart.


Vow 37
______, you are a star from the heavens to love, honour and cherish, for all the days of my life.
You are my pearl of choice, my strength at my side.

My love for you will never fade.
You are my love, my life, my wife.
May God bless our marriage in peace and happiness for all time.

Vow 38
_________, I love you. You are my best friend. Today I give myself to you in marriage. I promise to encourage and inspire you, to laugh with you, and to comfort you in times of sorrow and struggle.
I promise to love you in good times and in bad, when life seems easy and when it seems hard,
when our love is simple, and when it is an effort. I promise to cherish you, and to always hold you in highest regard. These things I give to you today, and all the days of our life.

Vow 39

… knowing in my heart that you will be my constant friend, my faithful partner in life, and my one true love. On this special [opt: and holy] day, I (affirm/reaffirm/give) to you in the presence of God and (all those in attendance/these witnesses) my (pledge/sacred promise) to stay by your side as your [opt: faithful] husband in sickness and in health, in joy and in sorrow, as well as through the good times and the bad.

I (promise/further promise) to love you without reservation, honour and respect you, provide for your needs as best I can, protect you from harm, comfort you in times of distress, grow with you in mind and spirit, always be open and honest with you, and cherish you for as long as we both shall live.

Vow 40

I vow to help you love life, to love you in all your forms, to always hold you with tenderness and to have the patience that love demands, to speak when words are needed, and to share the silence when they are not, and, I promise I will never forget that this is a once in a life time love.